“When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don’t blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change.”
~Thich Nhat Hanh, Peace Is Every Step
As in gardening, so in life. If I don’t tend my garden, if I don’t carefully water and weed and love my garden, it will show that neglect. If I don’t tend my relationships, my responsibilities, my spiritual path, my physical presence, they will also show that neglect. Likewise, if I love and care for these things, they will reflect that love and care.