I have been exploring some of my own personality habits. I’ve found that defensiveness is a common thread. I could go on and on about my personal life and what causes me to be the way I am. But the core of every one of these situations involves boundaries. Boundaries are the crux of every single human interaction. It’s where the personality dynamics of Ego come together. We all have to learn to interact with each other. Life is one giant school of boundaries. And, of course, what is a boundary but energy. Everybody’s ability to acknowledge, create and honor their own energy is constantly in flux. It’s affected by coming into contact with other people’s energy. 

I see the big picture of egos bumping into each other, and I know that I am the only one who is in charge of my own situation. I also see the bigger picture of all this energy creating opportunities for learning, the aspect of everything somehow going back to The One. I could really use some clarification here.

A’riquea: This is a good thing to be thinking about, because the current social and political climate in your culture has become confrontational. The collision of egos is affecting the overall energy of human existence. You want to be thinking about your own energy, because that is really the only place where you can actually be effective. It is difficult to separate the ego energy from spiritual energy because, as you know, they occupy the same space. But it is important to be able to pull back enough from the perspective of Ego to be able to connect with Spirit. This lines up with the directive to embody a spirit-led life. 

This was discussed at length in the first book (Grandmother Dreams), so we are not going to go into that in depth here. In all of these situations involving boundaries, you will have a better outcome when you are able to recognize your spirit, when you able to choose movement that feeds Spirit, and to carry that through. It is a learning process, there will be errors along the way. But overall, the more you practice, the more you will be able to sense the difference, and the more you will be able to function from this position. 

As was discussed in the second book (Traveling Light), this is about choosing where you place your attention. It is not something that is done occasionally. It is a way of Being. It takes practice. The more you practice, the more comfortable you will be in this energy arrangement, and the more you will function like this in your everyday life. 

You will want to be doing this, because you will see how it improves your own life. It also improves the path that humans are evolving along. 

Go ahead and write down what you are thinking.

This helps me realize that I don’t have to worry about hurting another person when I set my own boundaries––if I am coming from a place of spiritual clarity. Setting boundaries for myself, when it comes from a place of spiritual centering, is not difficult. Instead of choosing what feeds my ego, I am choosing to let my spirit lead. All it requires is placing my attention on the energy coordinates of spirit, rather than ego. It’s just an expanded dimension. The ego is more compact, limited to the immediate Point of my physical body. Within that same space is the expanded dimension of Spirit, which includes the energy-space inside and outside my body. Ego energy is like being tightly screwed down to the floor. Spirit energy is like being a bird released into the sky. 

Two situations I was looking at earlier show two sides of the ego coin. In one, the other person feels like a predator and I am the prey––they are continually pushing their energy into my space and I am trying to defend myself against that by retreating inward. Going to my dad’s to provide personal care, on the other hand, is too much of my energy going out, and I am not able to control the dissipation that that creates. These are both ego positions. They are both unbalanced. 

Interesting to note that in describing those two situations, I am getting pulled back into Ego function. I feel myself losing the spaciousness of spirit. When I talk about that spaciousness, I come back to it. So it’s that simple to move back and forth between Ego and Spirit. I am wondering how to maintain the spirit space when my ego is confronted in either of these situations? I hear the answer: it’s where I place my attention.

Maintaining  that spiritual space is a matter of practice. Then I heard these words, too: Firm, Clear, Consistent. Sounds like parenting. 

A’riquea: It is very much like parenting. What you are trying to do is provide support and guidance. For your own self. Berating yourself for errors, focusing on the problem, or ignoring the situation will not be helpful. Focusing on solutions, creating opportunities, and acknowledging success will have better outcomes. 

It’s important to think about this not in the small perspective of the ego, that somehow this behavior is going to make all of your relationships magically heal. What it is meant to do is to enrich the space that you function in and also the energy of related dimensions. This is an evolutionary directive that has positive personal benefits. Don’t try to solve an ego problem using the ego. Solve an ego problem with spiritual energy, and know that you are also becoming part of dimensional evolution. Become One With All.