Looking at our patterns and practicing new ways takes time and patience. Sometimes, cataclysmic events occur in our lives that force change. The psychic upheaval may be so great that we cannot possibly go back to who we were before.

A’riquea:*  Everyone does have some kind of “negative” experiences in their past. It is not possible to be human and not have had some loss. Loss can come in many forms, of course. Loss of innocence, loss of trust, loss of family connections, loss of Home location. How an event will affect one person is variable, depending on their previous choices and learning. Trauma defines significant or multiple losses, something that stretches a person’s coping ability in such a way that new ways of being are required to go forward. Look up Trauma.

‘Trauma’ comes from the Greek word for ‘wound.’  It is defined as both an experience and it’s aftermath: it is an experience that is deeply disturbing and distressing, and it is also the shock (psychic, emotional, physical) that follows such an event.

An opening is made in the way that a person thinks about the world. The opening is such that the person cannot go back to thinking the way that they did before the trauma occurred. Sometimes people have difficulty making the change, and it may take a long time. Sometimes the change is never made, and people choose to cover their confusion and loss with addiction. 

Trauma itself breaks the connection to cultural conditioning. Of course, it can also spin the other way and become a bondage, but trauma provides an opportunity to see the world in a new way, it is a chance to shift perspective….The very act of healing requires a new way of Being. That is the gift––that one cannot go back to the way they were before the trauma. That is difficult to see in the short term. There is an intense feeling of loss. Healing requires the embrace of that loss, the recognition that something has changed, and the courage to move in a new direction. Healing is a kind of rebuilding. Of course, people can choose to move in new directions at any time. Trauma is not a requirement. The opportunity is always there.

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*Traveling Light, Moving Our Awareness Beyond the Five Senses,  p. 154-56.